East Meets West in the Behind

Submitted by mumunmumun on 17 July 2012   •  Opinion

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It’s pure genius I tell you! A perfect blend of the west and east culture, in the harmony of something so essential to us all… I’m talking about the flush-able squatting toilet with hand pump and toilet paper (this applies better at public toilets). I’m surprised that no one has ever emphasized it before!

For a girl, this toilet is the ultimate invention! Think about it!

The Sitting Toilet

The western world has always found a comfortable position for any daily activity, even taking a crap. You sit and read a paper without the fear of falling off or your foot slipping in the hole. You can even sleep while sitting on it! And let’s not forget the comfortable position to throw up once you’re drunk like a liquor store. Plus, you don’t have to look at your shit, the plumpy mold of digestion remains!

Flushing is heaven sent! It’s service in a button, easy by one touch.

East and west 

But have you notice how there’s a big concern about the hygiene of butts when in contact with the seat itself? Suddenly we have to wipe the toilet seat with special soap or wipes, or we have to lay a layer of special shaped paper before actually sitting on it. A waste of paper! Plus the deal with toilet paper?! It’s a waste of paper and trees and forests and resources and climate change! Need I continue? Please don’t make me.

It’s confusing to eastern people once they step in to a cubicle. What is there to do when you only have a toilet, a piece of tissue, and no water and soap? This was the thought I had when I first stepped in to these cubicles in elementary school. So I crapped in my pants staring at the toilet cause I seriously didn’t know what to do.

The Squatting Toilet

The eastern lands love to squat, not only on their toilets, but in their daily lives. Amongst the middle to lower class Indonesians, a lot of the activities are done by squatting like washing clothes and dishes, cooking, and even high school kids coming home from school to hang out by squatting on the side of the road. We do a lot of it! If you’ve been to Vietnam you’ve probably noticed this, too. When it comes to the toilet, we enjoy this position. It is also clinically known that the squatting position is actually healthier for you bowel movement. There is less abdominal push reducing the risk of hemorrhoids. Seriously!

Although looking at your own crap is a devils doing for some, it’s necessary at times. The condition of your feces can indicate the condition of your bowels. If there’s clotted blood that means there’s something wrong inside your digestive system. If it’s runny blood, it’s a wound near the anus. If it’s too dark you need fiber, etc.

For Indonesians, we wash with water. Yes, we use our left hand to wash up, which then is soaped till clean. Washing with water is refreshing. I read Stan’s link and I agree, in such a tropical country washing up with water is essential to reduce bacterial development. Thus, the hand water pump is a super blessing and helps us achieve a dry toilet which is a lot more hygiene. Besides being refreshing, the water pressure helps the cleaning. It’s a culture thing, JES!

east

But the squatting toilet can be annoying sometimes. Peeing can be splashy! The distance from the loo to your privates actually affects the impact. The closer, the splashier. Eww! And if it’s the number 2, a long squad will cramp your legs up rather than offering the relief that you’re looking for. Add to that, once you had a few bad constipated days, your poop becomes extraordinary in size. That’s a pain when you have to without the flushing button.

Now comes the best part, the combined western and eastern toilet.

The Flushable Squatting Toilet (Equipped with toilet paper and water hand pump)

Take the best of both culture and mix it. And there it is. Making it short:

– you worry less about diseases transmitted from toilet seats

– you clean less area on a squatting toilet

– you see your crap for a good purpose

– you push less and wont’ worsen your hemorrhoid

– you can flush automatically afterwards

– you can wash up

– and dry the damp area with a bit of tissue

west

When traveling South East Asia, Indonesia included, you will see a lot of these toilets in public restrooms. After reading this post, you shouldn’t be confused anymore on how to utilize it. Perfect! See? Now why can’t other gadgets be as genius as this? Why can’t the east and west work together and then create something beautiful like this?


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riri
riri
8 years ago

hahaha, grreat post! I do prefer squatting toilets with hand pumps, believe it is more hygienic.

Ayos
8 years ago

Genius! Love this post! :))

Kieu
Kieu
8 years ago

Neither now that I’ve experienced both. Lol. I, however, am in love with Japanese toilets. The Western one with the heated seats! 😀